Tuesday, November 6, 2012

How Do You Grieve For Someone Properly?

I happen to know a lot of people who’ve lost their parents. While I’ve always sympathized, there was a detachment from the experience. I think that’s understandable though; how can people possibly understand the loss of a loved one unless they’ve gone through it too?

Instead, I’ve always pitied them, thinking “it’s awful for them but my parents are going to live a really long time”. 

Because they’re invincible?   

I’m obviously a fucking idiot.

Now I look at my friends who’ve lost parents and wonder how they’re even functioning. Because the grief is so overwhelming, I feel like I’m going to crush under it.

At the same time, I don't know if I'm mourning properly. How is someone SUPPOSED to grieve?

For instance, what’s the proper etiquette for announcing a death in the family in the age of social media? Should I update my Facebook status with a message like “my dad died and I’m eating cereal for breakfast”?

These are the things that go through my mind. Maybe I’m focusing on the trivial so I don’t think about other stuff. 

I’ve been actively distracting myself for the last two months. I watch tv shows, I read, I bake, I obsess over my hair.

When it first happened all I wanted to do was exercise. Things have settle down a bit more I guess. I can think about him without bursting into tears. 

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