Friday, December 12, 2014

Jealousy is a Waste of Your Time.

I was talking to a friend about Instagram and some of the people we both follow and she told me that she unfollowed a lot of people recently. When I asked why, she said seeing those women post pics of their seemingly perfect lives was making her feel insecure and jealous and she didn't want that kind of energy around her so she just stopped.

I totally get. It's so easy to forget that what people post on social media is an edit of their lives; all of the fat days, zit days, no-sleep-last-night days etc. are left on the virtual cutting room floor.

But for me, I love following people that I admire. It inspires and motivates me. This wasn't always the case.

I remember being a teen telling my mom that I was jealous of a girl. I'm not sure why but  I think it was something about her skin (I've dealt with cystic acne since I was about 10). My mom told me back then, "instead of wasting your time being jealous, why don't you just ask and find out how she did it?" It never occurred to me that I too could get what another girl had just by asking how and then working for it.

I didn't actually take my wise mom's advice until a few years later when I was in college. I was walking on a treadmill, pre-occupied with the lady in front of me because of her perfect ass. It was a phenomenal, perfectly shaped, non-jiggly ass. I remember being so annoyed, thinking "why does she get to have a perfect butt and I'm stuck with this cellulite-ridden backside? That bitch. Life is so unfair, woe is me, wahhhhhhhh."

I was actually heated but my pity party was cut short when I remembered what my mom said. What was the point of being jealous? It didn't help me at all. It wouldn't make my ass look like hers. Just like that, I made a decision to stop wasting my time being jealous of other people. If I wanted something, all I had to do was work hard for it.

I jumped off of the treadmill and approached the lady with the perfect ass. I told her I loved her butt (because flattery never hurt one's cause and it was the truth) and asked what she did to keep it looking amazing.


My point is, let those who have what you want motivate you. Make them your allies in reaching that goal, not your enemies. At the end of the day success in anything is about hard work and no one can do that work for you.

Besides, nobody likes a hater.